SPRING IS HERE PEOPLE. Well actually it is still kind of deciding but from here on out it is Spring for me…especially because I packed away all of my Winter clothes. We were recently introduced to an amazing shoe brand, Public Desire and have since become a bit obsessed. These “sassy shoes for the not so basic” are super cheap and the perfect way to keep your feet on trend. This outfit is the perfect spring transition look because you can throw on a dress but still cover up your (pale, in my case) legs.
While I do love Spring time in New York, I sort of had a slight breakdown moment last week when it came to wearing dresses out and about. For some reason, men think that just because you are wearing a dress, it is an invitation for even more cat-calling than usual. Just because my legs were visible, that seemed to mean that I was simply asking for their attention and crewed remarks. All I wanted to do was go home, change and get into a pair of sweatpants. But then I thought, you know what f*** it. I shouldn’t have to change, society should. Because even when I do go home and change into sweatpants that doesn’t stop the street harassment either. Every girl endures this, every single day especially in New York. You tend to get used to it, learn to block it out and simply just brush it off but sometimes it is just so overwhelming and it can really get to you. I have a couple tricks I have picked up since living in New York that I am happy to share but please don’t take this that I am accepting the cat-calling but more that it is not worth any of my attention. First, when wearing a dress above the knee, I tend to wear a long duster jacket so when I am walking by myself it covers me a bit more. I also walk around the city in flats and then change into heels right before I get to my location as to not draw more unsolicited attention to myself. I recently started wearing absurdly large headphones (so people can clearly see them) and walk around with them on my head but don’t turn on music. This way, it looks like I am not paying attention/listening but I am also hyper aware of my surroundings at all times.
Street harassment sucks, it really does. So how can we as women and especially women in the fashion industry, work to bring awareness to make it stop? If anyone knows of any groups or organizations against street harassment we would love for you to comment below.
xx
Kelly
Great post! First things first, the boots are killer. Now onto the topic of cat calling. I had a long conversation with my mom when I first moved to New York about this. I wanted her opinion on if I should wear more "frumpy" clothes until I get to my destination to avoid the attention. Her answer was a straightforward no. She says wear what I want to wear, when I want to wear it, and don't feel uncomfortable for wearing a cocktail dress to Target if I need to pick up last minute goodies. Society needs to stop putting women down for appearances… We should never have to feel like we need to change who WE are in order to appease someone else's desires or false ideas. Just because I'm wearing a crop top does not give you the permission to harrass me and then make me feel like it's my fault and I was begging for attention. If I wanted your attention, trust me I would have got it without this outfit. Sorry not sorry.
Wow, seriously thanks so much for writing this (I just got the chills I am not kidding). I completely agree with you. We shouldn't have to change what we are wearing just to make the attention stop because honestly it doesn't. Even if we do wear "frumpy" clothes it doesn't even make that much of a difference. It is disheartening that so much of this goes on in NYC because I love this city so much. But it's with support from each other that make it all better!!!
You look absolutely stunning, I like everything about this outfit: the way you combine different patterns and different colours! Keep up the good work, I will keep following your awesome blog.
With love, Elien 💋
Wow thank you so much!! So happy we connected Elien!!
You already know I'm absolutely obsessed with this look and those incredible boots.
As I was saying on Instagram, I've begun to get even more cat-calls while I'm doing a photoshoot. It's like people think that just because there's a camera on me, it's alright for them to yell out of car windows while passing by, or walk by quietly going "damn girl" as they pass where they know I'll hear them. I hate it, but I've learned to just almost turn it into a joke. If someone honks while driving, I'll give them a thumbs up or a funny face or pose in a ridiculous way. If someone walks by making comments, I'll just say "thanks, somewhere around 7000 other people agree with you on Instagram" and that shuts them up. If they realize you're proud of the way you look and don't give a crap what they think, sometimes they put their foot in their mouth (although I'd like to stick my foot somewhere else haha).
I just wish we could live in a society where this wasn't an issue in the first place, for women OR men. I know that women tend to receive it more often, but I've even seen my boyfriend struggle with it. We're human beings, not slabs of meat, and we deserve to be treated with respect. You rock for putting yourself out there and talking about it. Major props.
Stephanie | drunkonvogue.com
Wow Stephanie seriously thank you so much for saying all of that, I seriously couldn't have said it better myself. I completely agree – the cat calling gets pretty out of hand especially when shooting. I wish I had the balls to say sh** back to them but honestly I try not to let them get a reaction out of me because sometimes I feel like that is all they want. Also you are right and I should have mentioned this in my post – it isn't just girls, it's guys too. I just wish everyone treated each other as if they were talking about their sister/brother or daughter/son because maybe people would then think twice about how they were making others feel. Nonetheless, it is just good that we are talking about these things, because conversation is the first step to really bringing about change!!! Thanks for your words girl, they are powerful!
UM– can we have a moment of silence for those boots?!? I am obsessed with this outfit! And the cat-calling is the same out here on the West Coast too! No matter what we're wearing! Keep doing you girl– you are killing it and look damn good doing it. Unfortunately, society tends to judge people for the way they look, or the clothes they're wearing, the only thing we can do is rise above!
XooX
Ashley
http://www.twopeasinaprada.com
Thanks for that Ashley! You are seriously the best (and I know I am obsessed with these boots too lol). But you are right, street harassment is everywhere and while I hate to admit it, I think it is just something all of us girls have gotten used to over the years. Like I was saying to Stephanie above, I just think it is good that at least us girls (especially in the fashion industry) are talking about it and at the very least, starting a conversation. XOXOX
First of all, AMAZING look! That scarf really ties everything together and makes the look super unique! As for the cat calling issue, I experience the same thing when doin a shoot in NYC. I mean, the general public seems to stare and wonder what's going on (Is this girl a model? Is she famous? Is she just super narcisitic?). All that I can handle. People are curious. But when it's a group of men gawking and staring at you, it's something different. It's violating. And then when the comments come out, I can't help but wonder who the hell they think they are!! Obviously posing for pictures in the middle of the street is going to draw a bit of attention. But don't turn it into something sexual. Don't look at me as if you're trying to undress me with your eyes. And the degrading comments are only making you look like a womanizing creep! I'm not interested in your opion of my legs (or any other body parts for that matter). It's truly something that no man will ever have to deal with. With all this uproar of gender inequality fo womens soccer, my inner feminist is getting very ANGRY. I would love to join you girls in some type of feminism campaign because things need to change for women and I'm sick of doing nothin about it.
xxx,
Danielle Muscarella of Moda D Fashion
http://www.modadfashion.com
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