Ok peeps, it’s that time of year again. I feel like I always preface this post by saying, these are less of “resolutions” and more like “pillars” that I want to consistently refer back to throughout the year. I know I have lightly talked about this, but this year has been extremely challenging. The end of 2020 was basically when I like blew up my life and 2021 was a whole lot of trying to rebuild but not quite getting there. 2022, already, feels different. I moved back to New York a few months ago and I knew it was what I needed to do, so I could fully heal from this past year. This year, I am dedicated to doing the work. I am dedicated to fully breaking things down to build back up. And while the work has already been extremely hard, I know that it is laying the foundation for who I am building myself back up to be. As I re-read pages of “Untamed” by Glennon Doyle last night, this quote really rang true: “If you let yourself shatter and then you put yourself back together, piece by piece, you wake up one day and realize you have been completely reassembled. The change that happens to people who really sit in their pain…it’s revolutionary.” So here I am, prepared to sit in anxiety and uncertainty because I finally feel strong enough to do so. With that goal in mind, I have crafted some pillars that I intend to guide my decision making this year!
After putting it off for a year, I finally started therapy a month ago. While my first few sessions have been followed with abundant tears, I have already been able to rewire with specific mantras when anxious thoughts take over. I have been working through some pretty harsh anxiety that has been fueled by some trauma and I am working daily to understand how that trauma has manifested in my life. The basic principle of understanding that and identifying it has been a relief in and of itself. Writing things down so you can take inventory of what may be a trigger to you on certain days has really been helpful to me already.
Get Out of My Head
For me, the only way to get out of my head is to help others. I used to be a part of the Planned Parenthood Advocacy Collective when I lived in New York a few years ago and it has been calling me back with all of the recent news. I just submitted my application to be a part of the collective again, so fingers crossed! If volunteering is something you are interested in, just get started. Think about what may give you heartbreak or what really pulls at you when you are reading the news and with that, you will find your purpose.
Continue Spirituality Growth
I started going to church again when I moved back to New York for a few reasons: 1) Connection to something larger than myself 2) Community 3) Reduced my Sunday scaries (lol I wish I was joking). Church to me is similar to meditation. I get out my brain and focus on something else. It helps me remember our true purpose in life, which is to love. Whether you believe in God or not, I challenge you to put aside some time every week to practice spirituality in any sense. Because, at the end of the day, it helps you lead with love and that will manifest in so many different ways in your life.
I am turning 30 in July and you know what? I really want to enter my 30s looking and feeling my best. And yes, a portion of that is vanity. TBH I have NEVER really weighed myself but I am feeling like I need a bit of a reboot when it comes to my physical health. Most importantly that comes down to eating whole foods (vs processed) and decreasing alcohol intake. This January, I am doing “damp” January (lol yes I coined that term) where I am only allowing myself 2 drinks a week IF it’s on a date. I am not fully restricting because I feel like that will give me an excuse NOT to go on dates and I am trying to push myself to date again. After January, I will reassess this plan and figure out what works for me! What I know right now, is that alcohol has been a huge trigger with my anxiety and recently has not been serving me. As for working out, well i’ll continue to do what feels good for my body! Recently, that has been walking 10K steps a day and working out 3-4 times a week. I used to go to yoga religiously before the pandemic and am looking forward to going to classes again because it does so much for me mentally!
SOOOOO there we have it. Ya, these pillars are lofty but I really like to have a “why” when I set specific goals. So when I am doing something I may not want to do at that moment (aka workout) I can always refer back to the larger pillar. If any of these resonate with you, let me know! I would love to chat about it together!